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09 March 2010 @ 05:26 pm
Deal Breaker  
I had a date the other night.  After a recent string of meeting douchebags, I was really excited about this guy.  He was nice and super funny. Totally my type physically and motivated about his career and passionate about life.  He actually had a job and a car.  We had a lot to talk about and he was easy to be around.  I made him laugh.  We like the same music and he bought me sour kids.  We played pool at a bar and then went to his place and played Mario Party.  He likes the same video games as I do.

Then BOOM....... He tells me he never, ever, ever wants to have kids.  Complete and total DEAL BREAKER.

Now usually I would assume he was just "young" and would change his mind later on in life.  But from my experience, guys will usually say they aren't ready for kids now, but they ALWAYS are open to the idea in the future.  Or they say they will definitely have kids in the future.  This guy had his many reasons for why he never wants kids and I believe he never wants them. 

I 120% want kids.  It got me thinking though.  If I fell madly in love, could I give up my desire for children if my partner didn't want them.  Nope.  Never could.  I would RATHER have a child than ever get married.  If I had to choose. 

So that was that.  Deal Breaker.  Either I continue to date him "hoping" he would change his mind and then suffer extreme heartbreak and a waste of time when he never does.  Or just end it now and not even get into it.  Unfortunately I have to choose the latter.  It's amazing how tough dating it is and what bad luck loop I seem to be stuck in.  But live and learn.

On to the next...
 
 
Current Mood: contentcontent
 
 
 
tres_chouettetres_chouette on March 10th, 2010 03:23 am (UTC)
I think I'd rather the kids too. They live longer and can look after me when I'm old and decrepit.

Maybe I'll marry for the youth. Sweet delicious ability-to-look-after-me-when-I'm-demented.
Soap-on-a-Ropedekanerab on March 10th, 2010 11:25 pm (UTC)
I mean it's a little of a touchy subject for first dates maybe he's not 100% anti kids, maybe just those "nah, I don't want kids" guys..

my mom didn't want kids until my dad convinced her!!!!

I agree though it would be so hard if you loved someone and they 100% didn't want them, lol.. i guess that's when an 'accident' could happen!
Jennanebula66 on March 10th, 2010 11:29 pm (UTC)
He brought up the subject. It was more of a passing "That's why I don't want kids" type comment. So I pried a little to find out more.

But no, he's definitely not one of the "nah, don't want kids" type. He was serious and had multiple reasons for why he didn't.

Who knows, maybe he will have kids or change his mind, but I am not going to waste a bunch of years of my life waiting to find out.